Indenture

I was talking with one of the FOH (faux) managers today about the sorry state of our existence, and surprisingly, it was the other person that brought it up. The jist of the conversation was that we had made more money, enjoyed greater freedom, experienced less stress and basked in far greater happiness when we were simple peons. Having reached management we frequently find ourselves working for substantially less than our underlings when factored out to an hourly basis.
I referenced a passage from Bourdain's book 'Kitchen Confidential", where he suggests that anyone looking to make a career in the restaurant biz had best be prepared to endure the suffering of countless indignities, such as the non-English speaking bus boy taking home more at the end of the day than you do.
The faux manager suggested that there is some illogical but deepseated drive deep within us that is willing to endure these pains for the sake of 'being something' more.
In my case it's the personal autonomy of management that I most enjoy. I struggle to acquiesce to authority at the best of times, so having a reduced number of overlords suits me fine.
I referenced Miller and Thoreau a lot in the conversation too, reminisced about how happy I'd been when I was living the Bohemian lifestyle; working just enough to get food and the most basic shelter and spending the rest of my days whilin' away the hours conferrin' with the flowers.
Of course I'm a father now. Part of what has me pursuing the Chef thing with more zeal than ever is that I want my kids to speak proudly of me, I do in fact want to be 'something'. I also have a responsibility to them to provide the essentials and more, so that they don't grow up with esteems damaged by what they didn't have as kids.
I am trading a significant part of my time with them away however, and as always, this is painful, but neccessary.
I think of the new guys that I just hired from India. One of them is a father, with a family similar to mine. He showed me pictures. They're all back home in India. Unreachable for the most part, except by mail. Recently this father has been working in London, Germany, and on cruise ships. He hasn't seen his family in years, and the reason is that he's trying to save to bring them to the West.
So I guess just barely making home in time for good night kisses isn't so bad.
However, with the dollar dropping the way it has been, online poker is starting to look damn good again. Being home with them all the time, with NO bosses at all was pretty good for the 2 years it lasted too.
Bah. I'm actually having fun being a chef this time around though. Just feeling a little overworked these days.