Instant Gratification.

I'm all about instant gratification. I say this and people say to me "I can relate" and they generally reference a shopping purchase. I'm far beyond that. I need instant gratification on everything, even negatives.
When I was a kid if there was a big kid that wanted to beat me up I could not stand the anxiety of waiting and would seek him out. In high school if someone told me they were going to beat the shit out of me after school I'd challenge him to do it that very moment because I had stuff to do after school. Again, it was because of the horrors of waiting.
When I have a band aid that I know is going to hurt to tear off I do it at the earliest opportunity.
But by far the greatest example of my need for instant gratification is my compulsive news checking. I check the news about 30 times a day. Compulsive is perhaps the wrong word. I've never dropped out of doing something in order to check the news, I haven't a need to check the news, but I do check it a lot. What I'm looking for is a disaster, war, assassination, tragedy of such proportions that I will be able to clear my schedule for the day and just do what I want to do.
I secretly hope for a massive B.C. earthquake or the outbreak of the third world war, just so I will be able to stay home from work for the day. I don't think beyond that to the suffering that will follow, to the feelings of those who have suffered losses. I just want some time off and a clearing of responsibility for a while. It's with this hope that I check the news 30 times a day. Isn't that awful?